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Sex and the City Quotes: Season 6


Samantha: I love the stock market. A room full of screaming, sweaty men, all trying to get it up.

Carrie: I like my money right where I can see it: hanging in my closet.

Miranda: Twenty dollars for a hamburger. Oh, that's reasonable.
Samantha: Pathetic! When I moved to this neighborhood, the only thing that cost twenty dollars was a hand job from a tranny.

Samantha: Just look at this street! Stella McCartney, Alexander McQueen. The only designer name that belongs in the Meatpacking District is Oscar Mayer.
Carrie: I never liked his clothes. Too fatty.

FBI Agent, to Samantha: Ma'am, can you undo your cuffs so we can use ours?



Miranda: They don't cook the food here?
Samantha: That's why they call it Raw. The raw food movement! People love it: Sting, Demi, Soon-Yi... soon me!

Samantha: Fuck me badly once, shame on you. Fuck me badly twice, shame on me.

Carrie: Meanwhile, I was finally confident I could heat up my sex life, because I was a sex columnist, I was resourceful, and I was drunkitty drunk drunk.

Berger, about Carrie's furry heels: What do you have there, a pet?



Samantha: Tell me why we're going to this again?
Carrie: She's an old friend going through a breakup. We're being supportive.
Samantha: On a Friday night?
Charlotte: She tried to kill herself!
Miranda: It was six Advil!
Charlotte: On an empty stomach!

Charlotte: Carrie, you have to know where he's been so you know what you're getting.
Samantha: As long as what you get doesn't itch, I say you're fine.

Charlotte: Doesn't that waiter look familiar?
Samantha: I fucked him.
Carrie: Oh! That guy!

Carrie: Charlotte, always the straight-A student, took to her Judaism class like a Gefilte fish to water.

[Miranda pulls a chain of condoms out of her diaper bag.]
Samantha: Oh, honey, isn't the baby birth control enough?
Miranda: They're Steve's. And Debbie's, his new girlfriend, that's her name. Debbie.
Carrie: Where are they doing it, Gymboree?
Samantha: Debbie does daycare.
[Brady picks up the condoms and puts them in his mouth. Charlotte is horrified.]
Samantha: Oh, honey, relax. I have those in my mouth all the time.

Miranda: I'm just getting Brady ready to go out for a night with his dad. Packing up the old diaper bag, making sure he has everything he needs: bottle... binky... TROJANS...
Steve: Look, Miranda—
Miranda: I'm not exactly thrilled that our baby is having sex already, but I sure am glad he's using protection!



Samantha: I tell you, it is so refreshing to be with someone who likes to fuck outside the box.

Samantha: Your parents named you Jerry Jerrod? No wonder you drank.



[Berger is shocked by the price of a Prada shirt.]
Prada Salesguy: But you will wear it forever!
Berger: Yeah, I'd have to! Does it also somehow open into a small studio apartment?

Carrie: It's a check from our publishers. They sold my book in Paris. It's an advance from France!

Samantha: All of Manhattan is here.
Miranda: Who's watching the island?



Smith, looking at his Absolut Hunk billboard: Fuck me!
Samantha: Well, that's the first thing every woman in town will be saying after she sees it.
Smith: It's huge!
Samantha: And that's the second.

Samantha: You know what I think? I think, don't do that.
Carrie: What?
[Samantha does an impression of Carrie's pout.]
Carrie: Well, I'm sorry, I'm upset.
Samantha: Well, don't be! You'll be even more upset when your face is all lined.



[Miranda can fit into her "skinny jeans."]
Charlotte: How'd you do it?
Miranda: Well, I got pregnant, became a single mother, and stopped having any time to eat.
Samantha: Oh, that's a diet I won't be trying.

Charlotte: I just feel kind of silly that I made such a big fuss about my ring earlier.
Samantha: Oh, honey, a diamond that big deserves a parade!

Miranda: I once was broken up with by a guy's doorman. "I'm sorry Ms. Hobbes, Jonathan won't be coming down. Ever."



Carrie: Stanny, are you watching? I'm about to try a catch!
Stanford: Maybe you should quit while you're a... live?

Carrie: I tried the trapeze yesterday for that piece that I'm writing.
Charlotte: I could never! I have the most terrible fear of heights.
Carrie: Well, I do not. You've seen my shoes.

Harry: I'm just here to drop off the photo proofs and the seating chart. We're going to have a quick bite to eat and then I'm going to take the place cards to the calligrapher.
Howie: And after that, if there's time, we're going to go around the corner and try to find our balls.

Miranda: He was funny. And cute.
Carrie: Yeah, and in town for a week! What's the point?
Samantha: That IS the point! It's the best possible scenario, because you know he's leaving.
Carrie: But it's like whatever happens, there's an expiration date. It's expiration dating.

Anthony: I want nothing but lilies on the huppah. The theme is yentil chic!

Charlotte, wearing her wedding dress: Is it okay?
Anthony: Okay? You're Audrey Hepburn... awitz!

Samantha: Listen, when you're on location, don't do anything I wouldn't do.
Smith: What's that rule out?
Samantha: Mmmm, there are things. Karaoke, I don't do that.

Carrie, about Steve's new girlfriend: Well, did you see her?
Miranda: Just her shoes and her nails.
Carrie: And?
Miranda: Both acrylic.

Stanford: He's certainly acrobatic.
Carrie: Oh yeah, he's a regular Jerk de Soleil. Do you think everyone knows I slept with him?
Stanford: Yes. And they all think you're a big hora.



Stanford: I also got them a CD of Free To Be... You And Me.
Carrie: I loved Marlo Thomas! I played that album all through the fifth grade. I wanted to run as fast as the wind.
Stanford: I played "William Wants A Doll" so many times I almost turned my little sister into a gay man!

Carrie, after being told to take off her shoes: But... this is an outfit!

Carrie: We've had a swell time, it's just... it's midnight, he's gay, he's got to start his night.

Samantha: I'm so sick of these people with their children. I'm telling you, they're everywhere! Sitting next to me in first class, eating at the next table at John Schu— [A child runs by.] Look at that. This place is for double cappuccinos, NOT double strollers. [Glances at Miranda.] I'm sorry.
Miranda: Hey, no need to apologize. I wouldn't bring Brady here. Mommy needs two hands to eat her eight-dollar cake!
Charlotte: You're not going to defend children?
Miranda: No, I don't like any children but my own.

[Harry has moved in with Charlotte and tends to leave used, wet teabags sitting around.]
Charlotte: There's just one thing and it's small, but it really grosses me out. We have a teabag situation.
Samantha: Oh, I understand. Just breathe through your nose.

Carrie: She's become this whole other person. It's like she's had two caesarians and a lobotomy.

Carrie: And how are [your chicken pox] today?
Miranda: Biblical. There's literally a pox on my house.

Carrie: Think about it. If you are single, after graduation there isn't one occasion where people celebrate you. ... Hallmark doesn't make a "congratulations, you didn't marry the wrong guy" card. And where's the flatware for going on vacation alone?



Miranda: I just got Brady to sleep.
Dr. Leeds: Now, do you sing to him?
Miranda: Only if he's been bad.

Charlotte: You're marrying him!
Carrie: Will you stop? He doesn't even live in New York, he lives in Denver.
Charlotte: People move! It would be so romantic.
Carrie: Or tragic. Seriously. If I had the guy in high school, what have I been doing for the last twenty years?

Stanford: God, I hate him. Come on, we're going over there.
Marcus: Why?
Stanford: Because you're in a tank top.

Stanford: ...we have to go get our tuxes for the prom.
Charlotte: Did you say the prom?
Stanford: Yes, it's a big fund raiser at the gay/lesbian/bi/transgender center. I'm on the decorations committee.
Anthony: What's the theme, Queer and Queerer?

Anthony: Oh, honey, wake up and smell the KY.

Charlotte: He and Stanford are in love!
Anthony: Well, according to "Honcho," he used to be in love all over town.

Charlotte: Did I ever tell you I was a cheerleader?
Miranda: No, because you knew I would mock you endlessly.

Carrie: I wanted a man who'd commit, not a man who was committed. Apparently we have to be more specific.



Carrie: Bet you can't get steaks like this in your little Napa village, now can ya?
Big: Where do you think this cattle comes from, a ranch on Canal Street?

[Carrie is crying in a restaurant.]
Big: She's fine. Can you bring some extra napkins... and some violins?

Charlotte: Big is in town?
Carrie: Yeah, he's here for a little heart thing.
Miranda: What, is he on the list to get one?

Samantha: He did something to me that was so perverse! Okay, I'm just going to say it. He tried to hold my hand.
Carrie: You mean to tell me that Smith is a hand-holder? And to think he once served us food.

Carrie: Honey, if it hurts so much, why are we going shopping?
Samantha: I have a broken toe, not a broken spirit.

Big: So I guess this is what we'd be like in our 70's. No sex and board games.
Carrie: Aww, you're already thinking about your next birthday?



[A performance artist is starving herself and refusing to speak while on public display.]
Aleksandr: You don't think it's significant?
Carrie: Oh please! There are depressed women all over New York doing the exact same thing as her and not calling it art. I mean, if you put a phone up on that platform, it's just a typical Friday night waiting for some guy to call.

Samantha: It's red! ... I'm Bozo the bush!



Charlotte: I could see it going somewhere.
Carrie: Oh please, listen, half the time I can't even understand him. We have nothing in common, he's in and out of Europe...
Charlotte: That could be good!
Samantha: Honey, you're not listening. She only wants him to be in and out of her.
Carrie: Yes, but in a much less obvious-sounding way.

Samantha: Don't play "hard to get" with a man who's hard to get.

Charlotte, testing fragrances: Maybe cucumber basil?
Samantha: Why would you want to smell like a salad?

Charlotte: How about pomegranate patchouli?
Carrie: No, you need something classic, clean.
Miranda: With just a hint of neuroses.

Anthony: Can we please talk about something else? I'll give you a hundred dollars if you say something bitchy about someone we know.

Charlotte: When did it become fall?
Anthony: Somewhere between your ovaries and my boredom!

Charlotte: Imagine, being blind and not being able to see a beautiful day like today. Can you think of anything worse?
Anthony: Stonewashed jeans and a matching jacket.

Samantha: So, how were they?
Carrie: The pancakes? Delicious, exactly what I wanted. I couldn't get enough.
Samantha: No, I was referring to the moves.
Carrie: Delicious, exactly what I wanted. I couldn't get enough.



Charlotte: Well, it all sounds very old world to me. Very 18th century Russia.
Carrie: Yes, and I live in New York City circa now. I think it's romantic when someone offers me a seat on the subway.

Carrie: You know that song he wrote for me?
Miranda: Yeah. Ick.
Carrie: Well, it had a name. La Femme Avec Le Yeux Lumineuse.
Charlotte: The Girl With The Eyes That Sparkle?
Samantha: What's French for ick?
Miranda: Eek!

Samantha: I had a cold, hard dose of reality. From this! Look!
Charlotte: You're in In Touch magazine?
Carrie: And that's your dose of reality?

Charlotte: I can't believe you would actually consider having a boob job.
Miranda: I can't believe you went to Planet Hollywood.

Carrie: How about I read you a little bit of my favorite poetry?
Aleksandr: Please.
Carrie: [Reads from Vogue] "Cocktails at Tiffanys calls for classic charm. Oscar de la Renta sleeveless silk full skirted dress with black patent leather bow belt." Now that is pure poetry.

Miranda: I said no white, no ivory, no nothing that says virgin. I have a child. The jig is up.

Carrie: So yesterday, the Russian read me a Russian poem. But, you know, in English.
Miranda: Are you just making this stuff up now?
Carrie: No. And this might sound crazy but I don't think it's an act. I think he actually means it.
Miranda: That doesn't make it okay! Has he considered your feelings?

Aleksandr: Are you okay?
Carrie: No! I'm an American. You gotta take it down a notch.

Miranda: Tell me what you're talking about.
Samantha: I'll tell you tomorrow. I don't want to ruin your special day.
Miranda: Forget about my special fucking day and be normal, please, I beg of you!
Samantha: I have breast cancer.
Miranda: What?
Samantha: See? Now it's my special fucking day.



Carrie: It was hard to be huffy in a cloth robe but somehow Samantha pulled it off.

Miranda: What I don't understand is, if they got it all, why do you need chemo?
Samantha: Because he's an asshole!
Carrie: Evidently there could be something microscopic.
Samantha: Like his dick!
Carrie: Excuse me, do you have cancer or Tourette's?

Miranda on Magda: She's made plans! She's going to Nannypalooza or something.

Charlotte on Brady: I'll take him! I'd love to take him! He's adorable.
Miranda: It's four days. Adorable stops after a day and a half.

Charlotte: Is it safe? Are there stairs? What about sharp edges?
Carrie: Charlotte, it's a death trap. We're just going to strap a pillow around the kid and hope for the best.

Carrie: Brady knocked the vase over.
Aleksandr: That's pathetic, blaming the baby.

Carrie: That attitude, by the way, that awareness on the part of a woman that time is a-tickin'—it's very sexy to a man.

Charlotte: Why should you give up having a baby for a man you hardly know?
Carrie: Why should I give up a man for a baby I hardly know I want?

Miranda: I'm in the woods in my negligee and my cell phone only has two bars left. HELP!

Miranda: Last night Steve and I held hands for an hour and a half watching... the fire. He was looking into my eyes; I was looking for the remote.

Miranda: I'm sorry, Steve, I'm an asshole.
Steve: Yeah you are. But you're my asshole.
Miranda: That's sweet. And gross, at the same time.



Aleksandr: I love your house. It's so you.
Carrie: Small and artless?
Aleksandr: No, warm and lovely.

Aleksandr: It was a rodent. You don't want this in your house.
Carrie: Well, maybe he was just crossing through to get to the much nicer apartment next door.

Carrie: At least it didn't happen in a room I actually use, like my closet.

Miranda: Samantha, I have to say, you are amazing.
Samantha: I am. And if you love me in chemo, wait till you see me at Smith's movie premiere. I'm getting a hot dress, fantastic shoes... I'm going to kick cancer and that red carpet's ass!

Cab driver: Where to?
Miranda: Um, Brooklyn, please.
Cab driver: I don't go to Brooklyn.
Miranda: Yeah, neither do I.

Carrie: Is this who I'm seeing—a man who kills mice and optimism?

Wig store clerk: Would you like natural hair or acrylic?
Samantha: Sweetheart, does it look like I do acrylic?

Samantha: What if it comes back? I could die, Carrie. With really bad hair.

Samantha: Maybe I should just shave it all off.
Carrie: Yeah, you could be one of those fantastic bald women who's all about earrings.
Samantha: I'd better not look like fucking Kojak.

Miranda: Oh my God... I'm married.

Carrie: Samantha is my friend. She's my family. My insides. She will be fine because she has to be fine. That's how important she is to me.

Charlotte: It's just a subway ride away.
Carrie: A subway that goes underwater! That's not normal!

Miranda: Why do I think living in Manhattan is so fantastic?
Carrie: Because it is.

Carrie: It would be childish of us to deny that our lives weren't changing. But for this night, none of us were going anywhere. That's the thing about really good friends and a really great Manhattan.



Aleksandr, reading from Carrie's column: It is my belief that the last time anyone actually enjoyed the 69 position.

Anthony: That is the fourth person to stop and gush. I swear that dog's getting cruised more than me, and we're on the corner of gay and gay.

Miranda: I had to walk all the way from the subway in these heels. My feet are killing me.
Steve: Why didn't you just carry them and wear sneakers like everyone else?
Miranda: Stop. You can take me out of Manhattan but you can't take me out of my shoes.

Stanford: Let's say hello [to Smith].
Marcus: I'm nervous. He's so incredibly hot in that Gus VanSant movie.
Stanford: Oh! But can he pull off a fuscia Oswald Botang shirt?

Samantha: Well, I decided to turn a little hair loss into a lot of hair gain.
Stanford: Oh, you're gettin' wiggy with it!

Charlotte: Smith is not gay.
Miranda: Of course not!
Charlotte: So this makes you his beard.
Samantha: I'm a beard in a wig.

Miranda: I don't talk to Steve about my work.
Carrie: And he doesn't mind?
Miranda: I think he prefers it that way.
Carrie: But you guys share everything else.
Miranda: Because we're in Brooklyn. There's no one else to talk to!

Samantha: Everyone's talking about me! In the blink of a tabloid I went from Demi to Liza.

Carrie: Oh, you are a good friend. All the way from Brooklyn to see a bunch of dogs run in a circle.
Miranda: She came to watch my baby get baptized, I came to watch her baby get judged.

Miranda: I thought you weren't going to sweat the small stuff.
Samantha: Look, I can't have cancer and be a fag hag!

Anthony: The frickin' dog just got her period! ... Show's over!
Charlotte: Don't say that! We can still compete. I once won a junior gymnastics meet when I had mine.
Anthony: It's a dog! What are you going to do, run around looking for a teeny tiny tampon?

Carrie: Trouble! Elizabeth Taylor just got her period.
Samantha: What?
Carrie: Mmm hmm, backstage. That time of the month.
Miranda: I thought she looked a little bloated.
Stanford: And she was so bitchy earlier.

Smith: Are you sure you want to do this?
Samantha: It worked for Paris Hilton. I need to set the record straight—literally!

Miranda: Elizabeth Taylor got gang-banged in the park?
Samantha: Oh god, that's so 80's!



Enid: Do you even like dorado? Because if this is a pity dorado, I can have crab cakes!

Aleksandr: Is this really how one finds love?
Carrie: No, it's just what we do to distract ourselves until the real thing comes along.

Samantha, about her vibrator: I'm telling you, I went into the kitchen to get it—
Miranda: Wait, why was it in the kitchen?
Samantha: I like to mix it up.

Samantha: Now, maybe in the Dominican Republic, people like to share vibrators, but this is America—land of plenty!

Charlotte, about Elizabeth Taylor: She's getting a little fat.
Pet store clerk: Oh, she's not fat.
Charlotte: You're right, that's an ugly term. She's... full figured.

Samantha: We're not going to encourage you to cross an ocean. We're selfish bitches who like you in New York!

Carrie: Maybe I can't leave New York. I don't know how I'd do someplace else.
Samantha: Believe me, your fabulousness would translate.

Carrie: He's very sweet. And smart!
Enid: He's a Hobbit!

Samantha: This funeral is better than fashion week!

Charlotte: I didn't know Lexi had so many friends.
Carrie: Well, she wasn't always so tragic. Remember the 80's? She was the it girl.
Samantha: I thought I was the it girl.
Miranda: Well, it's your word against a dead girl's, so—you win!



Samantha: Would you like another cocktail?
Carrie: No, no, no, I can't be drunk on the plane. I want to arrive stunning and impossibly fresh looking.

Carrie: Today I had a thought. What if I... what if I had never met you?

Carrie: I fell. I fell in Dior. So I decided that the more I purchased the less they'd think of me as the American who fell in Dior.
Aleksandr: They don't think like that.
Carrie: Well, not anymore they don't. This is the shopping equivalent of a lobotomy.

Big: You're the loves of her life and a guy's just lucky to come in fourth.



Charlotte: I cannot believe this is finally happening. I hope nothing goes wrong.
Anthony: Well, if it does, I know some gays who got a Guatemalan kid for like a hundred bucks.

Carrie: I'm looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love. And I don't think that love is here in this expensive suite in this lovely hotel in Paris.

Big: It took me a really long time to get here, but I'm here. Carrie, you're the one.

Carrie: Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you can find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous.


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